Finally!!

There's that smile! It's been play peek-a-boo with me for years now, but now it here. No matter what it's finally sticking. I don't know if I can rightly explain it. Since before the divorce I felt lost; my world changed without considering what I wanted. I've been slowly dealing with it, the ups and downs. Gil was right, once I think I'm done dealing with one thing something else will crop up. There was one final piece, or at least I think it's final, that needed to be addressed; My trust of God and Godly men. I didn't realize that I felt as though I was let down by both, but I realize it now. Since I see what the issue is we, God and myself, will tackle it. Izzy and I have been talking about this for a little while now and I was going through the motions, but not letting our words go to my heart. Now this week, on Monday, He got me. Pinned me to the mat and convicted my heart. Finally I can work on this. I've found myself smiling and laughing for no reason. More and more colors are popping back to view. My faith was a huge piece of my world and I turned away from it out of fear. I'm not afraid anymore. I know I have strong hands to hold, faithful ears to hear me, and a nonjudgmental face looking back at me.